The very nature of a human being longs to be loved. Deep down in the soul of every human is the desire for someone to love and cherish him/her. God, in the beginning, said; “It is not good that man be alone.” Genesis 2:18 The God of love made the perfect match for this dilemma by bringing a woman to a man. “And the Lord God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept: and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man. And Adam said: ‘This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.’ Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.” Genesis 2:21-24
God has established the desire for companionship between a man and a woman. Any other type of union is an aberration from God’s creation. The Scripture says that “Jacob loved Rachel”. Genesis 29:18 Laban, Rachel’s father told Jacob that he must work seven years for her. Jacob agreed to do so and it was said that the seven years “seemed only a few days to him because of the love he had for her”. Genesis 29:20
I believe that it is the loss and neglect of this foundational marriage covenant that has damaged the souls of many. A wife who experiences the love like Jacob’s love for Rachel is going to be full of meaning, security, peace and, may I add, joy! And the husband likewise will experience the same peace as he is loved by this wife. The love for one another is the glue of the marriage. It is also the basis for the flow of this love to the children which will give them a sense of security and peace. It is an environment where the longing for love is satisfied.
Add to this the training of the biblical truths of Scripture and you have virtuous sons and daughters; children of dignity, morality and love. They will not have to long for love for it has been poured out upon them by their parents. This is God’s plan for love. When this is not functioning, the soul may become subject to torment.
Anyone who is single is subject to torment in the soul if he or she has no sense of being loved and cherished by someone. This can lead to a dungeon of torment, a place of desperation. The rejected or abandoned marriage partner can also succumb to this pit of darkness.
Separation from a spouse may be one’s own doing. The person is not the victim; he/she is the cause. This can lead to an idolatry of the loved one that has been lost. The longing for love, a legitimate longing, has moved into idolatry. He or she has made the person that once loved them an idol. This is a walk on thin ice that will not hold. Only God can take us across the thin ice. Watchman Nee, in his work, “Spiritual Man”, says it like this; “Only God can satisfy a Christian’s heart; man cannot. The failure of many is to seek from man what can be found only in God. All human affection is empty; the love of God alone is able to fully satisfy one’s desire. The moment a Christian seeks a love outside God his spiritual life immediately fails.”
God has pleasure in relationships as long as they are in line with the truths of God. We are not to make idols of relationships. There is only one God. “There is no other God besides Me, a just God and a Savior; there is none besides Me.” Isaiah 45:21
Life has a lot of heartaches, troubles, valleys, etc. If you are in a difficult situation, trust God with the unmanageable. “Though He slay me, yet I will trust Him.” Job 13:15 Make a stand, for righteousness’ sake, to be faithful to the Lord in your storm. Keep your testimony! Bolt to prayer! Keep your love for the Lord in the midst of the storm and He will sustain you. (Psalm 55:22) King David experienced storms and this is how he prayed: “In my distress I called upon the Lord, and cried out to my God; He heard my voice from His temple, and my cry came before Him, even to His ears.” Psalm 18:6
Spend some time in Psalm 18 and be encouraged!